If you know someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD), you are familiar with the pressure this condition can have on your relationship with them. You might not always know how to react constructively. Mental health illnesses like BPD could result in frequent destructive behavior, relationship, and impulse issues.
Relationships are challenging for everyone involved with someone with BPD because they frequently doubt themselves and others and feel extreme emotions. A fragile or shattered sense of identity is considered the primary reason for BPD. At times, it can be tied to childhood trauma or neglect. Because not everyone who experiences trauma as a kid goes on to acquire this mental illness.
No matter what the cause may be, here are some strategies on how you can support someone when they’ve been diagnosed with BPD.
Read Up On The Mental Health Disorder
If you wish to provide practical assistance, you can start by learning all about mental illness. This way, you will not only be aware of the symptoms and causes but also let your loved ones know that you’re there for them.
You’ll be able to respond in a better and more constructive way when the core reason for their behavior is recognized. People dealing with BPD experience minor daily aggravations that escalate into significant relationship issues.
Nevertheless, these confrontations may be prevented or minimized based on how other people react. For instance, most individuals will simply change their plans when faced with a canceled dinner date and accept it. But, for a person living with BPD, this can be perceived as abandonment or rejection, which sets off a strong emotional response.
Recognizing this behavior as a misunderstanding motivated by fear and expressing your desire to connect might be a useful approach. You can quickly respond with a rescheduled date so they can let go of the idea that they have been abandoned or rejected.
Be Calm And Respectful
Early childhood trauma has a high correlation with BPD. Their sense of security and power over themselves and other people gets shattered due to their early-aged trauma. Mental health books suggest that you approach the connection in a way that fosters love and trust, as these qualities can be beneficial and therapeutic for an individual with BPD. Knowing that you handle everything regarding their lives with care, they’ll start to develop trust toward you.
Show Them Care During Conflicts
Long-term care and sharing happy and sad times are key components of connection. Conflicts and arguments are challenging for those with BPD because they perceive them as signs of indifference or relationship breakdown, which leads to feelings of rage and embarrassment.
E-books on mental health suggest that supportive individuals can offer perspective and assist the person in realizing that conflict is a necessary component of a successful relationship. After a disagreement, supporters can help by contacting or showing up. Show compassion and forgiveness by concentrating on the individual rather than their actions.
If you want to learn more about how you can support a loved one living with BPD, grab a copy of “A Notebook Of Love”. Luis Trivino, a U.S. Army war veteran, details his thoughts on his marriage and true stories on mental health. Get one today!